Rob-pandemic

Such a tragic female global pandemic,
Questions of cure are purely academic,
For there is not one single afflicted woman
Who wants to be cured of Robert Thomas Pattinson!
It may well be the obsession is age-inappropriate,
Nor the manifest symptoms easy to appreciate,
Otherwise perfectly sane and normal people
Rendered hallucinogenic and real-life incapable!
We forget we have boyfriends, husbands or jobs,
Or even children – all our attention are Rob’s!
We spend countless hours and endless energy
Drooling over Rob-voice, Rob-video...anything Rob-pretty!
Ah, a common New Year Resolution may well be wise:
Every one of us should undergo a Pattin-exorcise!
Ah, but what kind of a life would that be
Without this sweet Rob-addictive insanity!
Just tell us the verdict and hand down the sentence:
We’ll do the time but expect no repentence!
We are in this for life and will not be free anymore
-destined to love our Rob and will do so forever more!
(24/12/09 @ 7.45 pm, NZ time)