Leaving...

It is getting light now
And the sun is about to rise
I am starting to feel sad now
And tears are welling in my eyes...

Why is it never never easy
To say good bye to you?
Such a familiar thing for me
Goodbye is a thing I do...

Why is the bye so good
It really should be sadbye
Always makes me down and blue
Always makes me cry...

So let me look at you once more
Let me hear your voice
Such a sweet and tender sorrow
This inevitable choice;
Remember me after I go
Hold me in your mind
Know how I love you so
Even as I leave you behind...
You must know how much I grieve
Leaving what I think I need
But this is what I do believe
Though this is hard indeed.

There are more things in the world
Than we can ever know,
We’re just a boy and just a girl
But we never had a show.

You think we should just do this
Not care what the world may say,
It is pure ignorant bliss
To think the tides will stay.

One thing I know to be
Forever constant true,
You WILL forget me
Though I will never you.

The days will ebb and flow
and then the marching years,
People come and then they go
You’ll laugh, you may shed tears...
But you will go on, believe me
And you will bloom and thrive
You are expansive and you’re meant to be
You must embrace your life!

I hope you will remember me,
But I doubt that you will;
But it doesn’t matter much you see
Because remember you I always will!

It is not the sun’s business that it shines,
It is not the rain’s that it pours,
So my words and soulful lines
Will be forever yours.

And just for today,
This moment in this rhyme,
Think of me and pray
As I tell you one more time:
I will love you for as long
As the waves will crash the shore
As sure as the tui sings its song…
Oh, I will always love you more!

(written on 31/7/09 when i was leaving the place i was staying. i was very torn between competing emotions: elated because i completed my writing project successfully, deflated because i was going home to a then-unknown space with my husband. i was not sure of what resolutions might or might not eventuate...i was also beginning to miss the shared confidence and intimate sharing space of the cyber-community of Robloving people i found while away. very maudlin and heavy posting, i am afraid...i was also writing about my husband because i was feeling vulnerable...)